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Sunday, April 24, 2011

Recovering myself through time of Easter ' Aqui vivimos'

I am one of those who live
in the middle of the sea and close to the twilight,
a little beyond those stones.

When I came
and saw what was happening
I decided on the spot.

The day had spread itself
and everything was light
and the sea was beating
like a salty lion,
many-handed.

All that deserted space was singing
and I, lost and awed,
looking toward the silence,
opened my mouth and said;
'Mother of the foam,
expansive solitude,
here I will begin my own rejoicing,
my particular poetry.'   (lamento: can be moan)

From then on I was never
let down by a single wave
I always found the flavour of the sky
in the water, in the earth,
and the wood and the sea burned together
through the lonely winters.

I am grateful to the earth
for having waited
for me
when sky and sea came together
like two lips touching;
for that's no small thing, no?
to have lived
through one solitude to arrive at another,
to feel oneself many things and recover wholeness.

I love all the things there are,
and of all fires
love is the only inexhaustible one;
and that's why I go from life to life,
from guitar to guitar,
and I  have no fear
of light or of shade,
and almost being earth myself,
I spoon away at infinity.

So no one can ever fail
to find my doorless numberless house
 there between dark stones,
facing the flash
of the violent salt,
there we live, my woman and I,
there we take root.
Grant us help then.
Help us to be more of the earth each day!
Help us to be
more the sacred foam,
more the swish of the wave!

Pablo Neruda


For few weeks I had to carry on my head where light was turning off and couldn't find another bulbs to change. Darkness was dancing on my shoulder with heavy panting dragging me deep down down down.
I had dreams, my father was holding my hands and when the road was separated he disappeared. Another one was this shadow man from past tied up my body on my bed. Another one was there was a lady who gave me lots of love made my lights turning on. How much I have to related with dreams sometimes I don't know. There are things I can't ignore at the same time I can't depend on them totally either. I am about to be ready for something new again. All I need is strength and steady steps. 'Strength' to be on the right way. Checking and checking what has been not right in my thoughts.... and fix them to be better. Harder this week was, Grateful my heart now is more than any other times still uncertainty and confusion are breathing quietly. I love Jesus even though i haven't been in the church for a long time. my small capacity of love...




There are no mistakes, no coincidences. All events are blessings given to us to learn from - Elisabeth Kubler Ross

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